[he's gotten used to staring at her mechanical face over the past week, and gently, he reaches out to press his hand against her cheek. or. . . where her cheek would be. it's strange, to have his fingertips pressed against cool metal instead of warm skin, but. .. ]
[. . .]
I don't know what you can or can't say. I have a lot of questions, but if it hurts too much, then. . . I won't ask.
[he thinks back to Luna theorizing that Nick had been killed for his special privileges, and he thinks. . . maybe, way back then, she had been trying to give him a hint]
If you mean not telling anyone what I found out here, of course I'd keep that to myself. Of course I would.
[but. . .?]
But the rest. . . we need to collaborate to some effect. Peach said so herself.
Peach is correct. Having everyone together has to be done, or... or we'll never find our solution. Akechi's meeting is still essential. There's just...
[Her empty hand lifts to touch the one resting against her face, his skin warm under the metal and plastic of her fingertips.]
There's just some things that might have to be left unsaid.
[he draws his hand away, but the movement is reluctant, and he aborts it after pulling back a few centimeters. and then he reaches for her hand, drawing it forward so he can place the phone against her palm]
One thing I learned from Peach's punishment the week she went too far in helping us is. . .
. . . we can't rely on the sisters, on Blue, on you guys to do everything for us. At some point. . . we have to stand on our own two feet.
[he curls her fingers around the phone gently, holding her hand now enveloped in both of his]
Thank you, Luna. For everything you've done.
god these tags are hard to write when i have no facial expressions to work with
[She just. Shakes her head in return, over and over. How she wishes she could explain herself. God, how she wishes she could just cry.
But she can't.
She just lifts her hand with both of his, lowering her forehead to it, just shaking her head back and forth insistently, repeatedly declining that what he says is true.
It's the closest thing to shedding tears that she can manage.]
[. . . he doesn't know what else he can do for her in this moment. everything he said about continuing on, standing on his own two feet, about taking things from here and solving the mysteries of this mansion without a crutch. . . he had meant it]
[he doesn't know what secrets she's holding back. doesn't know the things she isn't allowed to say. but he ducks his head forward, presses his forehead against the top of hers, and stays like this until she feels as though she can pull herself back together again]
[Thankfully, it's the barrage of questions she can't answer and emotions she can't field that are what locks her up. So as soon as he's gone quiet for a little bit, she seems to calm down in due fashion, her wings shifting to stretch open as she gently tries to straighten herself up with a shuddering exhale.]
...If three more people die... I think we're going to be in horrible, horrible danger. More than we are now.
What people have or haven't done... it won't matter if we can't finish what we've started.
We have to stop this. We... we're going to stop this.
She sets the phone aside, only to reach her own hand to take up his touch again, a little awkward with the lack of skin.]
It's why I came out here, you know. Whenever I come here and think of why this place is here, and what these tombstones might mean, especially given the stories we receive... I can't help but think of the people we're going to leave behind. Fifteen of our own... and nine other parties worth of those who failed to know what we've had time to learn about.
It's... a lot. I don't like the feeling of it at all. But...
I made a promise to Reito, that I would always be here to take care of him. That he would be able to see his family, and that he wouldn't have to feel alone. Even after everything that happened between us, I... I didn't ever want him to feel like he might be in danger.
[And now he's a statistic. A soul waiting to be eaten alive by the house in an arena they cannot touch, his life taken from him. Just like all the other spirits.]
[he says that so confidently. . . with everything coming to a head as it is, it's amazing how he still manages to sound so firm. how he manages to keep a hold of his courage and faith and determination, even when things could go oh-so horribly wrong with just one slight mistake]
[but hey. . . that's how he had always been, right? even when there is doubt churning in the pits of his stomach, crawling up his spine and sending shivers through his body. he shoves it aside to believe in himself, because he has to]
[because if he didn't, then he would fail. at least. . . that's what he believes]
...Right. Despite my worries... if we approach this any other way than head-on, then we'll more than likely seal our fate on hesitance alone. That's too big of a risk.
[...]
Your bravery is admirable. Has... anyone told you that before?
[here is where i would put my expressions IF I HAD SOME]
I think they go hand-in-hand sometimes. To hold onto an idea that's important, regardless of fears, regardless of what other people might say... it can be reckless, yes, but... I think it's still brave.
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
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Compliant, she turns her head, a horribly mechanical motion, the red lights now focused on him.]
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[. . .]
I don't know what you can or can't say. I have a lot of questions, but if it hurts too much, then. . . I won't ask.
But don't be ashamed. Okay? Don't be.
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...
There are so many things she wants to say. So many thoughts that form, and then crash and burn. But an order was an order.
She can only look at him, and mutter:]
I... I can't help you.
I'm sorry.
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[his voice is firm, unwavering. the same confidence and determination she's come to know of him these past six weeks]
If this is the limit of what you can do due to some stupid rule imposed upon you for your special privileges, then. . .
I'll take it from here.
I'll help you.
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The only way to help is to not say what you know about what's in your hand.
Please.
Please trust that Peach wasn't lying when she said they did what they did for Phoenix's safety.
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[he thinks back to Luna theorizing that Nick had been killed for his special privileges, and he thinks. . . maybe, way back then, she had been trying to give him a hint]
If you mean not telling anyone what I found out here, of course I'd keep that to myself. Of course I would.
[but. . .?]
But the rest. . . we need to collaborate to some effect. Peach said so herself.
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[Her empty hand lifts to touch the one resting against her face, his skin warm under the metal and plastic of her fingertips.]
There's just some things that might have to be left unsaid.
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[he doesn't know if he agrees with that, but. . . well. they'll have to see come the meeting, right? and he can ask]
Like what?
[other than her and Akechi's identities]
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I can't say anything else. But... you had the right idea a minute ago.
...
I... I will need the phone back, though. I'm sorry.
You can look through it if you want. It's empty.
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[he draws his hand away, but the movement is reluctant, and he aborts it after pulling back a few centimeters. and then he reaches for her hand, drawing it forward so he can place the phone against her palm]
One thing I learned from Peach's punishment the week she went too far in helping us is. . .
. . . we can't rely on the sisters, on Blue, on you guys to do everything for us. At some point. . . we have to stand on our own two feet.
[he curls her fingers around the phone gently, holding her hand now enveloped in both of his]
Thank you, Luna. For everything you've done.
god these tags are hard to write when i have no facial expressions to work with
His words are still so warm, and yet she still visually crumples again at what he says, her voice trembling.]
...Please don't thank me.
8(((
No. I'm going to. You may not feel like you've done enough, but trust me.
You have.
[and he won't let her take that away from herself]
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But she can't.
She just lifts her hand with both of his, lowering her forehead to it, just shaking her head back and forth insistently, repeatedly declining that what he says is true.
It's the closest thing to shedding tears that she can manage.]
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[he doesn't know what secrets she's holding back. doesn't know the things she isn't allowed to say. but he ducks his head forward, presses his forehead against the top of hers, and stays like this until she feels as though she can pull herself back together again]
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...If three more people die... I think we're going to be in horrible, horrible danger. More than we are now.
What people have or haven't done... it won't matter if we can't finish what we've started.
We have to stop this. We... we're going to stop this.
Okay, Akira?
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I know.
[she says nothing that he doesn't already know deep down, but he also understands that in a way. . . this is her placing her trust in him, isn't it?]
We will stop this. We will.
We won't fail, no matter what.
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She sets the phone aside, only to reach her own hand to take up his touch again, a little awkward with the lack of skin.]
It's why I came out here, you know. Whenever I come here and think of why this place is here, and what these tombstones might mean, especially given the stories we receive... I can't help but think of the people we're going to leave behind. Fifteen of our own... and nine other parties worth of those who failed to know what we've had time to learn about.
It's... a lot. I don't like the feeling of it at all. But...
I made a promise to Reito, that I would always be here to take care of him. That he would be able to see his family, and that he wouldn't have to feel alone. Even after everything that happened between us, I... I didn't ever want him to feel like he might be in danger.
[And now he's a statistic. A soul waiting to be eaten alive by the house in an arena they cannot touch, his life taken from him. Just like all the other spirits.]
I'll... I'll do what I can. Whatever I can.
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Luna. . . what makes you think that we can't save them?
[what makes him think they can?]
Because I refuse to leave anyone behind. Our own, or those who were here before us.
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I... I'm more worried about the lack of time, and the implications of even a partial failure. That's what I meant.
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[he says that so confidently. . . with everything coming to a head as it is, it's amazing how he still manages to sound so firm. how he manages to keep a hold of his courage and faith and determination, even when things could go oh-so horribly wrong with just one slight mistake]
[but hey. . . that's how he had always been, right? even when there is doubt churning in the pits of his stomach, crawling up his spine and sending shivers through his body. he shoves it aside to believe in himself, because he has to]
[because if he didn't, then he would fail. at least. . . that's what he believes]
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[...]
Your bravery is admirable. Has... anyone told you that before?
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[that takes him off guard, and his expression slackens just a bit, brows shooting upwards]
What? I--
[just. more slow blinking]
I don't. . . know if it's bravery. [a huff] Excessive stubbornness, maybe.
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I think they go hand-in-hand sometimes. To hold onto an idea that's important, regardless of fears, regardless of what other people might say... it can be reckless, yes, but... I think it's still brave.